I'm back!!! Updates!

Yo everybody! I'm back! I'm back!

Anybody miss me??

Haha. Maybe yes. Maybe no.

Anyway, here's an update after ages. Sit still!!! And read. And stop complaining. At least I made the effort to write you know!!! So just come back and read and BE GRATEFUL that I write!!!

Ok ok. I've been busy. Travelling all over the places. Basic places are Kapit and Sibu. Went to the sites and offices. Attended site meetings, briefings and all sorts of activities. Progress assessments, planning, trying to meet the targets and all those stuffs.

In the middle of all the hustle and bustle, I stopped and realization hit me with a huge bang.

I realized that I've been trying to do everything - all at once!

And damn. All those shits sound like the scope of work for a bloody Manager. AND I'm not a Manager.

-_____-''

I feel sooo cheated.

And I'm under a lot of pressure to perform due to the nature of the jobs eg. BigBigBig boss(es) come from overseas and their expectations easily surpass Mount Everest.

Simultaneously, I have to meet the expectations from my Boss, my Boss's big boss, my Boss's big boss's big boss, and all their other bosses.

Trust me. My name was quoted and referred to in every goddamn meeting.

[my name] can do this.

[my name] can do that.

[my name] will see into it.

[my name] is preparing the plan.

[my name] is handling them [those frigging problems] now.

[my name] is assessing the progress...

[my name] will see to it...

bla bla bla

Somebody hand me the damn oxygen tank. I have difficulties in breathing.

I'd be suffocating soon.

Why?

They believe I can do the impossible. That I can turn the impossible into possible.

The picture they want me to paint is totally dark though. Ruined. Read : cannot be saved.

Slim chance.

How to turn a totally ruined-charcoal-black picture into a nice piece of paper with rainbows and stars painted all over it??? You tell me lar. How? HOW??!!

I'm so dead.

2 weeks from now, I'll have arrows and gun holes all over my body. Right now, instead of preparing the plan on how to save every shit, I'm preparing the plan for myself. They are:-

Plan A : I'm praying that God will help me. Give me miracle. I so need one right now. Anything is fine with me. As long as I don't lose the job!!!

Plan B : Start finding a new job. And God please deliver a job straight to my doorstep!

I knew I've been recruited to take care of shits. I knew I'd be dealing with lots of shitty stuffs. I knew that situations were bound to be terrible, unbelievable and downright dumb.

But this one, totally swept me off the ground. I'm not given ample time to SOLVE the problems. Too many unknowns. Too many vague shits. And no answer at all.

If I managed to pull through, I'd be one frigging wonder woman. And damn, if I manage to clear all those shits, I may as well set up my own damn company.

Life's tough. Miserable. Full of ups and downs. It's a love hate relationship. I love life. And yet I hate it too. Ironic huh?